Unpopular opinion

If this has been a bumpy or curvy time for you, first, let me say heck’ya, umm- yup, and I recognize that many folks’ roads are not silky smooth rn.

Today is the shortest day of what felt like the longest year.

If this has been a bumpy or curvy time for you, first, let me say heck’ya, umm- yup, and I recognize that many folks’ roads are not silky smooth rn.

This time of year, there are always many pieces published about why we don’t reach goals — and the usual explanation is that we’re weak, we’re lazy, no one knows how to work anymore, that kind of thing.

It’s as if we’re all living with the constant reminder that there’s something wrong with us, something that needs to be fixed/addressed.

I’m going to call BS on that. Maybe that applies sometimes, but there’s a reason we’re not putting the effort in most of the time.

After the year we’ve just had!?

Let’s give ourselves a fucking B R E A K here. 

There’s nothing wrong with us. 

We don’t need any ‘fixing .’ If we don’t have it all figured out yet, we don’t have to feel shitty about it. 

Now a lot of advice-giving-type people completely disagree with me on this. They’re all about shouting at you, calling you weak, and telling you you must hate yourself to make positive changes. All I can say is that I’ve seldom seen this work, and sometimes when it seems from the outside like it’s working, when you dig deeper, you find a lot of unresolved self-hatred or misery. 

That’s my bias, and you can agree with it or not — you’ll know if this feels right to you.

I lack patience and tolerance for general bullshit, not just the winter solstice or dark, moody cold Canadian winter nights?

No matter your situation, anywhere on the planet, this is what you have to work with — the arena of things you can change.

We can change our habits. We can change our behaviour and activities, even if it’s hard as hell.

Making our own rules; accepting our constraints

A lot of the time, we use our beginning-of-the-year goals mainly to make ourselves feel bad.

Give yourself some grace for the coming year.

We’re just coming off our second REALLY Hard Year, and the new one will probably have its share of tough spots. Give yourself credit for what you do and some grace for what you’re still wrestling with. You aren’t alone. 

So, if the foundation of smart goal setting is getting honest with yourself, without kicking yourself, and you want sustainable change to happen. Stick around! So we can make it make sense for you where ever you are. 

Signing off for 2021!! I love that you are here.

Thank you!

See you in the new year!