I hope this message resonates as a toast for the douchebags, the assholes, the scumbags, and everyone I know who needs some skills in consent. Myself included.
I am diving deeper into the Wheel of Consent by Dr. Betty Martin. This week, I started the professional course to bring into my practice being a better human!!
Recovering from high-control coercive groups and spiritual systems is like trying to untangle a telephone cord 📞—a bit of a mess. But guess what? The Wheel of Consent is made for the messy knots of life, courageously helping me rebuild trust in myself and those around me. It's like having a secret sauce for the complexness of human connection!Â
This year, navigating the wild jungle of relational trauma in my marriage felt like trying to find my way out of a maze in the dark. Being a beginner learner of the Wheel of Consent, I suddenly saw a map with a big ol' "You Are Here" arrow. Insights into my own role in being hurt and unintentionally hurting others? Consent is more than just a yes or a no. So yup! The Wheel has become a beacon of clarity in relationships where assumptions and societal constructs are as common as Monday mornings.
Pure revelations are happening! Let me share a couple of highlights:
Dysregulation ≠Consent: Feeling like a walking tornado doesn't mean allowing anyone to storm through my boundaries. Recognizing my tendency to fawn to keep the peace was a real "aha" moment—like finding that missing sock in the laundry.
Picture this—I'm negotiating discomfort like a pro, thinking it's a minor inconvenience. Who knew I had a black belt in tolerating awkwardness? Now, I'm aware of the choices I've been making about accepting others, and it's like switching on a light in those dark moments.
If you haven't checked it out already, I'm excited to connect you with the Wheel of Consent. It's going to be my trusty sidekick in deepening my self-understanding. Exploring boundaries and consent feels like reclaiming lost pieces of myself, especially considering my childhood history.
And here's a quirky tidbit for you, something I just learned: My enthusiastic "hell yes" during an experiential session translated into a deep yawn and an overwhelming sense of restfulness. My body says, "You're on the right track; take a breather." - a thumbs up from my comfort zone.
Thanks a million for creating this safe space to navigate the twists and turns of personal discovery cuz we’ve been puttin' up wit' shit just way too long.
Bring it on!
Cheers to the journey, baby, I got a plan,
Hey, thanks for being here with my introspective email! Here are a couple of thoughts I had:
Have you ever encountered a personal "aha" moment or revelation that significantly impacted how you navigate relationships or boundaries?
What's your go-to resource for negotiating discomfort or awkwardness in your interactions with others?