Monday, May 15 @ 1:06 pm
This email is dedicated to Christy.♥️
Unveiling the secrets of my writing process: My words are in your trusted hands as we unravel the mysterious world of captivating content at OH MY HEART. But before we dive in, let's take a moment to appreciate the million things I did to avoid writing this email, showcasing my incredible ability to procrastinate. Here it is:
Joined my self-made "Avoiding Email Writing" workshare with Coach Sonia Simone. I even turned on my camera to prove I was present, but let's be honest, I was just there for the guilt-free distraction.
Checked out my Spotify Daily Mix 1, paired my Sonos Move, and discovered some sick beats. Suddenly, I felt inspired to create a new playlist and became the DJ K OH of my procrastination party.
Camera off, I ventured into the treacherous realm of Facebook Marketplace in search of the perfect bedroom furniture. Found a mind-blowing deal on a 1970s MCM Solid Walnut Brutalist set. Sent a DM because who needs to write a boring email when you can have edgy bedroom decor?
I googled "Brutalist" to ensure I wasn't getting into some weird, kinky furniture situation. It's a design style, not a secret society. Phew!
Texted Tarzan about everything and anything, even though we just had coffee and a hike this morning. I see her "read" response, so clearly, she's not too busy to indulge my procrastination antics.
Confessed my email-writing struggles to Tarzan, hoping she'd offer to save the day with her email-writing superpowers. Alas, she suggested that I should, you know, write the email myself. Thanks for the million-dollar motivation, Tarzan.
Started text rambling to Tarzan about the mind-blowing smoothie I made for lunch. These recipes are born in the brain of @jackfruitwatermelon and have the most beautiful images to get distracted by on the gram. I swear, adding mango was like discovering the secret to life itself. No response from Tarzan. Should I buy a juicer?
Still need to start the email, but let's shower and wash my hair. Oh, the sacrifices we make for cleanliness. It's not like my hair takes forever to dry, especially with my expensive hair dryer that promises hyper-speed drying. Thanks to client GM for the excellent hair tip!
Check Voxer! Let the debriefing begin! It's time to dive into the tender heart of a fascinating client who embarked on an MDMA trip that shook loose some buried emotions, tucked away sad memories, and opened the door to bid farewell to pesky feelings of unworthiness. I am here for it.
Joined a special committee meeting to develop guidelines for safeguarding psychedelic therapy: Navigating using psychedelics with love, care, and caution for cult survivors
Lost track of time in back-to-back sessions. Email? What email? Ain't nobody got time for that.
Voxer me, anybody!! YES!! Another client question, right on!! This time about Microdosing, yes, you can make your capsules too! Get mush here.
Had an intense conversation with my husband about the book he's reading, "Weathering" by Dr. Arline T Geronimus. He caught me up emotionally about the complex themes of family dynamics, mental health, resilience, and the impact of race and systemic oppression.
Miss Vicky's Salt and Malt Vinegar chips could solve all the wordy problems.
Got the Wordle in 3. Wordle is life. Yup, I said that, Dani Rojas.
Found out the bedroom set I wanted was sold, but not as a set. Why would someone do such a cruel thing? Splitting up a perfect match. Heartbreak.
The music stopped, left in silence, and finally, a moment of tranquillity. It's late, it's Monday, and the email won't be published for another 26 hours. Time is on my side, or so I like to believe.
Contemplated writing an email about my bizarre plan to conceive my children from the same ovary. It seemed like a quirky idea on Mother's Day; deep down, I know my kids' sibling bond has nothing to do with my unconventional fertility plans, perinatal psychology or cellular memory. It could be plain old good parenting. Or they worked hard to be good humans like we all have to.
Stared at the blank email draft, wondering how the heck I managed to waste so much time. Ah, the wonders of procrastination!
So, here we are. I finally made it.
Monday, May 15, 6:23 pm
Thank you to the thousands of eyeballs reading these weekly blurts.
You make procrastination worthwhile every time, always lifting my open rates to new heights.
Love your guts, my friends. Keep shining!
The extra bits at the end, because you say you love this part best:
Tarzan's new website launches today!! Don't miss the grand reveal—it's a wild ride you won't want to miss! She is an amateur outdoor adventurer and internet sensation that teaches the POWER of mastering life's challenges in EMAIL. She offers valuable resources and storyteller wisdom. I love that human.
Last week, I had the incredible opportunity to attend the Paddling Film Festival at our local indie film house. It was unbelievable! I witnessed the awe-inspiring journeys of athletes exploring, pushing boundaries, and wholeheartedly embracing the exciting world of paddling, doing things I will never do!
Fellow psychonauts! I took a trip down memory lane when I learned to concoct my own microdosing LSD tinctures. Ah, the days of 2016 diving deep into YouTube tutorials, mastering the art of DIY psychedelic adventures. If you're curious to learn the secrets of this microdosing LSD alchemy, ask here. They will help spill the trippy tea! It's easy.
Did you know working with me in a 6-Month Package is like snagging a VIP pass to personal and professional growth? We'll have a blast with weekly sessions, giving us ample sessions to work your magic. And I'll be right by your side even between sessions, offering unlimited Voxer support because I'm all about being there for you when needed. After all, we're embarking on the deep integration journey together! Let's talk about 1:1 Coaching if you are interested in how extraordinary things can happen! Book a call with me!
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1) I love that this email is dedicated to little old me!
2) I can relate to this kind of procrastination on a deep level BUT on the upside, it sounds like you got a lot accomplished despite not writing this email.
3) One of the things I deeply appreciate about our work together is the Voxer conversations. It helps me sort things out and feel supported (tremendously.) Thank you.
4) One of the most underrated things about working with MDMA is the trickle epiphanies (as I like to call them) that happen in the days/weeks/months after the session. It’s the gift that keeps on giving!
5) I love you. That is all. 💗
This might be the best email I've ever read. PERIOD.